3 Reasons Why Happiness is Elusive

We talk about happiness every day of our lives in ourrehab, and Whitney Houston with the perennial
elusive search for it. We see happiness as somethingproblems with Bobby Brown. They might be very rich
external we can just pluck out of nowhere when wepeople but has their money helped in their search for
want it, just call it up when we want to have a betterself-appreciation and love? If we are unhappy with our
day. Moreover, happiness seems to affect everyonenose, no amount of fiddling with our hands will sort the
else except us. If you are looking to the outside worldproblem with that nose until we address the real issue.
or to material things for happiness you are looking inMany celebrities believe that fame and fortune will
the wrong place. Real happiness cannot be found inmake them happy, but then reach their desired
outside of us. Often we are denied happiness becauserainbow only to find that they left their pot of gold way
we don't know how to begin the search.behind them. Happiness starts from within, when we
Happiness has given us humans a lot of trouble forare truly happy with who we are and seek no
three main reasons. First, we don't know how to defineapproval. When we can accept our warts and failings
happiness to suit ourselves. Everyone definesand realise that nothing detracts from the magnificent
happiness in a different way. Quite simply, manyand amazing beings we are.
people don't know what they want to make themFinally, happiness eludes us because we think we do
happy so their choices change literally according tonot deserve it.
their moods. They believe happiness is something theyI met a guy once whom I really liked but we never got
work towards not realising, or accepting, thatoff the ground because he kept saying how he didn't
happiness starts inside of us first. It is not an idealdeserve me or such a wonderful relationship. He was
destination we spend our life heading for. It actually isdwelling on the fears in his head instead of giving
with us every day, from this minute, and demonstratesthanks for us finding each other. Naturally, his fears
itself in how we love and appreciate ourself. How canbecame a self-fulfilling prophecy because his negative
we ever find happiness if we don't know what itthoughts began to sabotage possible meetings. As he
means for us?felt he didn't deserve me, he immediately put mental
How can we be truly happy if we are not clear aboutbarriers to enjoying my company. Somehow, there
what makes us happy or we expect others to fulfilwas always a crisis whenever we set dates. He then
that need? Defining what would make you happy,felt terrible about it, which increased his feelings of
whether your purpose in life, your desires or visions, isinadequacy and reinforced his thoughts of being
the very first step to being truly happy. It means whenundeserving even more, in an unending vicious circle.
those things appear you will recognise them instead ofWe cannot have the opposite of what we are thinking.
living in ignorance of who you are and what makesWe have to think as we mean it to happen to get the
you tick.results we are after.
Second, we are always looking for happiness withSo begin the process of defining happiness as it
someone else or with material things. We often believemeans to YOU. What would really make you happy
that getting a new dress, a new car, new flat, newfor the next few years? NOT forever, because we
yacht will do the trick: to bring us that elusive happinessevolve as people and our needs inevitably change with
we have sought. But any material things give ustime, and not just for a moment either. Then look inside
moments of temporary JOY. They do not give longof you to see how you feel about yourself and how
term happiness. Material things help us to enjoy variousthat happiness will sit with your general contentment
aspects of life that money can buy but they bring noand esteem. Then believe you deserve it because we
happiness where we live without self love, withoutall deserve happiness. Some people are not just sent
esteem, without love for others and without care andhere to suffer and some to be happy. We all face the
compassion. We can have everything in the world atsame possibilities. Our outcomes depend on the
our fingertips, but if we lack self-love and contentment,choices we personally make which then decide the
especially when we feel like crap, we will remaindirection we ultimately travel: whether towards finding
unhappy.that elusive happiness or moving even further away
Address the Real Issuesfrom it.
Cue stars like Britney Spears, Robbie Williams, both in